First love…

Loneliness..once in a while you embrace this feeling,surrounded by everyone you love but still feel it.I guess there is not a reliable explanation..

However, I suggest a small test…close your eyes…relax..wipe your worries away and clear your mind and soul …do you hear it?No? then you are missing something..lets try again…its there you can’t miss it…it’s crying for you…its hiting the rocks only for you..to come , to become ONE ..She's smashing herself on the sandy beaches for you…feel the breeze taking over your body..the salty air  surrounding you with all its kindness…Misterious ..calme..patient..she’s waiting because she knows deep down that you will return no matter what ..you’ll be there…I miss you and we will soon meet again ..my beloved   friend

Is it too late?

I know ..i’m selfish you’re right, but my ego is killing me…

I expect too much from people and I just can’t help myself not being furios when they don’t do as I please..i mean  I’m just sitting here waiting for you to do everything ..to get into my soul,my mind and “read it”as a list of wishes .Yes,the poor little rich girl is too scared to admit what she truly wants ..afraid to open her  heart and demand what she wants ..sometimes I wish you read my mind and see how much you mean to me ..how much I care and how much I want things to get better….i want things to fall from the sky ..anything and everything I want..but we can’t go on if you are the only one who is building the bringe ..we are so far away ..i want to help you built  it but everytime I try I mess things up because I don’t know what to do and how to handle things because I’m scared because I don’t want to get hurt..i’m afraid you’ll get tired of fighting for me and you’ll take me for granted…we’ll see after tonight whether or not , we are meant to be, even so..i just want you to be happy with or without me..and yes my world will probably fall apart but I’ll get better someday just not today

Make a wish and place it in your heart. Anything you want, everything you want. Do you have it? Good. Now believe it can come true. You never know where the next miracle is going to come from. The next smile, the next wish come true. But if you believe that it's right around the corner, and you open up your heart and mind to the possibility of it, to the certainty of it, you just might get the thing you're wishing for. The world is full of magic. You just have to believe in it. So make your wish. Do you have it? Good. Now believe in it, with all of your heart."

One Tree Hill

mistakes...

........

12.04.2012
 I haven’t written for a while maybe because I didn’t find the need  to express my true feelings  I’d rather remain stonned than have emotions and to leave everything just the way it is…no complication just the same boring routine..nothing new , nothing old but nothing the same …
After so much time when you figure out  that you don’t know a thing about your life ..in the  glance of a second the tiny drops of rain can change your personality and your perspective regarding  your entire existence

Old self

I'm so sick of us!
Sick of  the talking
Sick of hugs
Sick of missing you
Sick of memories
Sick of stories
Sick of hope
Sick of apologising
Sick of forgiving
Sick of thoughts
Sick of always being there
Sick of pretending to be ok
Sick of always showing that smile on my face
Sick of complaining
Sick of  fake love
Sick of tears
Sick of fairytales
Sick of your lies
Sick of not having the strength of telling you "NO" everytime you come to me
Sick of you...sick of us